There are days

Sometimes there are days when your 9 month old is teething and wakes up every hour on the hour. You wake up feeling a little insane with two toddlers demanding attention the second they wake up... no joke it's instant. You feel so groggy and exhausted that even an extra cup of coffee can't seem to do the trick. You are cranky and short with all your kids and start feeling guilty and inadequate with your role. "Lord can I really do this?.. Most importantly can I do it well?" You sink deeper into exhaustion,  feeling so overwhelmed that all you want to do is cry. "Lord please let me make it through this day, this week, this month, this season with joy in my heart and find strength in You".

And then there are the moments where the Lord shows you just that. When brothers share the last tortilla chip at the restaurant without being asked. When they randomly come find you in the kitchen to give you a hug and tell you they love you before running back to play. When brothers wake up from naps and I hear laughter from opposite ends of the room or when you have a spontaneous hike with all  three of your boys after leaving the park where major tree climbing and bird chasing are in order.When your 9 month old masters sitting and you find him randomly sitting and playing with his toys and has the look of joy and accomplishment on his face.  When your son declares that he has Jesus in his heart. Yes there are days like this too.

Not everyday is the same in motherhood or really in life but I pray that even through tiredness and bad under eye circles I am able to find the joy that makes this journey worth it.